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I heard about Juán Gabriel’s death Sunday and had no idea how hard it would hit me, until some guy posted on Facebook that he didn’t much care for El Divo’s music, completely missing the point of how beloved Juan Gabriel is in Mexico, and what he has meant to generations of popular Mexican culture through thick and thin.

I listened to his music for hours Sunday night, something I had never done before. As I went through the pages and pages of You Tube videos, I realized how his songs and musical lineage gave me an immediate and comforting oasis for things of the heart and human love, a cultural respite from the current wave of public hatred against Mexicans. He is ours and we are his.

Even his last tour, MÉXICO ES TODO, is a proud and arguably defiant act of cultural solidarity with the Mexican People, at a time when we are experiencing frontal racist attacks from abroad, and despite the internal corruption of a Mexican government so cold-blooded, it is using military force to kill indigenous school teachers on strike.

But in the end, there is still culture. In the end there is still Juan Gabriel and his ability to humanize us, to move hearts through song with messages about love so familiar you cannot ignore them. AMOR ETERNO.

A prolific songwriter and producer, he wrote over 1000 songs, many of them for the likes of las grandes damas del canto mexicano: Lola Beltrán, Amalia Mendoza (La Tariácuri) and Lucha Villa. Lola Beltrán was one of the first to recognize his talent, and she mentored him right into the highest echelons of Mexican music production. She was his madrina. She held him by the hand and used her own fame to bring the gifted brown beautiful unknown young gay mexicano onto the world stage.

He even wrote a song about the great Diva of Mexican cinema herself, María Felix, María Bonita, La Doña, beloved muse of Mexican composer Agustín Lara.

Years later in his own tribute song to La Doña, Juán Gabriel compares her to the Virgin Mary, the Dark Virgin, La Virgen Morena, who is also Tonantzín the Aztec Mother Goddess. He calls her The Face of God, causing a stir among the gatekeepers.

Perhaps his well-known close relationships with so many acclaimed women artists had much to do with his love and longing for his own mother. Forced by her condition as a poor woman whose husband had gone mad, she put the sensitive 3 year-old in an orphanage.

Despite his suffering, he was a man who liked women, capable of sincere admiration and respect for them and their talents. He devoted many years of his career writing songs for theirs.

On stage he never missed a chance to call out to mothers and to the masses of poor workers and ordinary citizens, the heart-broken, the lovesick, those who (like himself) have struggled to survive, the invisible backbone of civilization. Under his gaze they were not invisible. He saw them: the poorest and most disdained of all. And they saw him as well, and in this seeing they accepted him and were inspired and loved him, naming him El Divo and calling him by a nickname they might have used for their own child, JuanGa.

A great icon AND a flamboyant gay man who also fathered four children, El Divo was brought into the fold by the most acclaimed of Mexican women singers and artists with genuine love, affection and respect for him, at a time when being a gay man in Mexico was completely lethal.

But his love songs trumped prejudice and his life became a gift so powerful it made hatred and homophobia turn on its head in a world where machismo is rife.

Many hundreds of songs and millions of records later, he practically died on the stage. He gave us his all.

Generations sang his songs and always will.

***

María Elena Gaitán (aka Chola Con Cello) is a musician, writer and performance artist. She has created new works under the Ford and Rockefeller Foundations and has been featured with conductor Essa Pekka Salonen and members of the Los Angeles Philharmonic. Last November she received the Sor Juana Lifetime Achievement Award from the National Museum of Mexican Art in Chicago. She is completing her first memoire and solo CD.

Across the nation, and here in the Borderland, we are still mourning the loss of the iconic and beloved, Juan Gabriel.

I want to make it clear that this is an op-ed piece from one voice. There are so many fans and great articles written about Juan Gabriel’s life that I will not try and compete, I am simply here to tell this story.

I was walking down the street in Washington DC when I heard the news; in that free-fall of a second, I was literally overcome with tears, I couldn’t stop the emotions. Instantly I was transported back to my beloved hometown, El Paso.

My earliest memory is sometime in the late 80’s probably a Saturday or Sunday morning, I can smell ‘Fabuloso’ in the air and hear mom’s favorite music in the background, “Escucha esta canción que escribí para ti mi amor …” and the hits would continue all day via records, and – in later years – via cassette tapes.

For many of us, this was the norm, this was the tradition: Juan Gabriel and Rocío Dúrcal’s music filled our home every weekend. And for many of us, Juan Gabriel is synonymous with “mom.”

He represents this connection to the previous generation. He is a piece of our heart, our families, our childhood, we grew up on his music and he will continue to live on through us.

It is so crazy how much his music has influenced my generations’ memories. In high school, I remember going to ditch parties with friends and either seeing the famous Noa Noa Night Club or hearing the actual song play at 1 a.m. through the streets of Juárez.

Even into early adulthood, as we all got together at a friend’s house or went camping, there was (and still is) that point in the night where the music gets turned UP and you will for sure hear Juanga or Chente playing …LOUDLY; that is the mark of a truly great time.

I can recall singing my heart out “Inocente pobre amigo no sabe qué va a sufrir…” plenty of times at home or karaoke. In college I used to play one of his songs every morning; I was struggling during those years and his “Señor Sol” always brightened up my mood.

For every heartache, every celebration, I feel like we all have these “Juan Gabriel moments” in our lives.

As a Mexican-American, there was always such pride when you went to see his show, not only was he from the same place my mother is from – Cd. Juárez, Chihuahua – but I felt like he was this favorite uncle in the story of my life, because my mother adored his music so much.

His music has bridged countries, whether you were born in Juárez or El Paso, we all can sing the lyrics to “Querida” at any given moment.

When I began to understand the world more, I began to realize how ahead of his time he really was. This was a young boy who came to Juárez with nothing, grew up away from his mother, and beat all the odds, going on to become an international icon.

In addition to his success, he broke one of the biggest barriers in the Latino community and was unapologetic about living his truth; what’s more interesting is that I can’t remember anyone in my group of friends really caring about what he did in his private life, we just loved singing his songs.

He was someone who stood up, in his way, to be a voice for the LGBT community and specifically for gay Latino men. In our world filled with “Mexican machismo,” he made his own rules and everyone loved him.

We are all in this shared experience, and are sharing in the loss. I know that for many fans (like our moms) that were with him since the beginning, he was equivalent to talented music sex symbols like Elvis and such (I have seen some of those youtube videos from back in the day pretty racy, lots of sexy dancing going on!) Although he was so much more, he wrote, composed and created much (if not all) original content.

I was lucky enough to have caught his show twice last year in Dallas then San Antonio; what an amazing artist. The only two people that have ever blown me away by their talent and majesty are Juan Gabriel and Paul McCartney.

He took us on a 3 hour journey and sang live the entire night! From the mariachi set, to the elegant love ballads, the festive party favorites, the emotion packed break up songs, he did it ALL. I was completely enchanted with his voice, the showmanship, his energy and majestic presence; it was unlike anything I’ve ever seen – and I doubt we will ever see again.

My heart is truly hurting over his loss, we will never have another like him. Juan Gabriel, pride of Cd. Juárez, Chihuahua, all of Mexico, and all across ‘La Frontera,’ beloved by many, missed by us all…thank you for all the memories.

Que en paz descanse nuestro querido Divo de Juárez.

Fans who had hoped to be sung to by the “Divo of Juarez” Sunday night at the Don Haskins Center, instead sang for their departed idol.

The 66-year-old was found dead Sunday, after performing Saturday night in Los Angeles.  As word spread, those who held tickets for the concert continued to show up in West El Paso, some bearing flowers, others with posters.

One group, the area’s Juan Gabriel Fan Club, had planned to present the singer a plaque, but now tearfully held on to it as well-wishers streamed by.

Singer Juan Gabriel, Juarez’s favorite son who went on to world-wide fame, has died in Santa Monica, California. Officials say he died of a heart attack.

Gabriel had performed Friday and Saturday night in Los Angeles and was scheduled to perform Sunday night in El Paso.

Gabriel, who was lovingly known as ‘The Divo of Juarez’ was still very active, touring the Americas and bringing his songs to fans all across the hemisphere.

The life and times of the beloved singer were recently made into a 13 episode TV series on Telemundo; the show was after one of Gabriel’s hits, ‘Hasta Que Te Conocí (Until I Met You)’ followed his journey from Juarez through his rise to fame.

Mexico’s President Enrique Pena Nieto, tweeted Sunday afternoon that Gabriel was “gone way too soon” and that his music and talent represented the best of Mexico.

Mexico’s former President, Vicente Fox shared, “Today Mexico has lost one of its stars. Rest in peace, Juan Gabriel, a great friend, great artist and wonderful human being.”

Just last year, Gabriel was in Juarez, as the city unveiled a mural in Downtown honoring his career and his deep roots in the city.

He performed a concert at the new ‘X’ monument in Juarez, in front of a crowd estimated at over 100,000 attendees.

His new tour, called “MeXXIco Es Todos” (XXI symbolizing the 21st century) was to make the rounds this fall in over 20 U.S. cities including Miami, Los Angeles and Chicago.

According to Gabriel’s career bio for his upcoming tour, his accomplishments were lengthy:

Before Gabriel was “the divo of Juarez,” he was a poor orphan on the streets of Juarez. His 1971 breakout hit was actually titled “No Tengo Dinero” (I Have No Money). It would be impossible to list all the hits that followed, as Gabriel has over 1,500 songwriting credits to his name, including “Querida,” “Amor Eterno” and “Hasta Que Te Conoci.” He’s released upwards of 50 albums, selling over 20 million copies and has produced 100 more albums for everyone from Paul Anka to Lucha Villa.

Born January 7, 1950 in Paracuaro, Michoacan, Mexico; his mother and siblings moved to Juarez, where she became a housekeeper. Gabriel spend his formative years in Juarez, and was virtually adopted as a native son of the city; Gabriel returned countless times to Juarez throughout his life and embraced the community as well.

The 66 year-old won countless awards and has a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame.

Officials have not announced any information about services or memorials, however in a live report via Univision, there was word that his body may be transferred back to Juarez.

 A Mexican Government Official also said a ‘very large’ memorial service would be set for Gabriel in Mexico City.

*** Editor’s note: A previous version of this story listed Juan Gabriel as a native-born resident of Juarez, the article has been corrected to include his original place of birth.